Monday, September 30, 2013

Decison Making Made Easier

Today I wanted to talk about decisions.  I think that everyone has – at some point – had to make one or two decisions that would change the direction their life was taking. And if it’s one of those crossroads that you are actually aware of – that you absolutely know what you resolve to do will affect everything you know, it can lead to slight anxiety. No, wrong. It can and often does lead to a full blown panic attack. Or perhaps this is just me.

Source: here

I was recently presented with one such Awfully Big Decision and I can tell you, the process of making a choice is not a fun roller coaster ride. But here I am at the end of it and I have a few points I would like to share with you in the hopes that they may help you in some slight way with whatever crossroads you may be facing in life.

Pros and Cons

I am a list maker. I live off of Pros and Cons. It is my go to method of making a decision. Writing it all out can make you more aware of the balance of things. It may not be the all deciding factor in the end but it is helpful to see, to read, why you feel something would be a good fit or why it wouldn't be. It’s also easier to prioritize about what’s really important in your decision making and what just might be an excuse to go in one direction.

Have A Chat

Go to a friend or companion and just have a talk out. Don’t expect that their opinions and thoughts will somehow enlighten you to making a “right” decision. The reason for the chat it to simply talk it out. Here it aloud. You can get a new perspective. By vocalizing your fears and worries, thoughts and musings it can make some of it seem a bit easier to understand. You might come across an “Ah-hah!” moment. Or that simple chat can simply ease anxiety. Release the tension that might have been building up and loosen you up a bit to have a clearer conscience of thought.

Accept Your Gut Feelings

Rolling around my own huge decision left me with tummy rumblings and a heavy panic. It was only when I allowed myself to embrace these feelings and get to why I was having that reaction that I saw things with a clear head. It wasn't just fear of making a wrong decision; I truly did have a bad feeling that, once reflected on, I found came from the simple truth -  I didn't really want the opportunity I was presented with. There were many pros to saying YES but I didn't feel that it fit me no matter how much I tried to convince myself I could grow into that fit. Just because something looks good doesn't mean it would be good for you.

Don’t Look Back

Boy can I say that I am Queen of WhatIfs and IWonders. Too many times in my life I have thrown something around and around in my head wondering, praying, hoping that it was the right thing to do. Those thought-moths in the brain can be quite chaotic and my advice to you – and to myself – is to grab your net and start catching them. Snag them before they grow out of control. Safely place them in a jar somewhere off to the side of your thoughts and leave them be. Regrets. Looking back. Worrying about the path you’ve chosen… it’s unhealthy and unhelpful. Move forward. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and pretty soon those moth-thoughts are forgotten and you can come to embrace and be thankful for the decision you made. Understand that these decisions are part of your journey of growth. Some might not make sense for a very long time but in the end, they will. Trust your inner compass.  Trust yourself.

and if all else fails....

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